The secret to a successful marriage

by Leah Rosenberg

People wonder what the secret is to having a successful marriage. As divorce is too common, what can be done to keep your marriage strong?

Judaism and Marriage

The Jewish people believe in marriage. In the second chapter of the Bible, God says, “It is not good for man to be alone. I will make him a helpmate opposite him.” Judaism values having a soulmate – literally. It is the person who has the other half of your soul and who you will spend eternity with.

And that is also why Judaism so deeply values working toward a good marriage. Marriage takes work. It is not something that just falls into place. And when people are selfish and choose not to work toward a better life together, they will so easily “throw in the towel.” Many people just give up. And for those who do not value marriage, giving up is easy. But what is the secret to a successful marriage?

Surprising Secret to Successful Marriage

Bias. You have to be bias. We all let ourselves off the hook when we do something wrong. But what about when our soulmate makes a mistake? We need to be biased and make the conscious effort to let it go. Your soulmate is an extension of yourself. If you can be bias toward yourself, do the same for your spouse. Presumably, your spouse is a human and makes mistakes. We all do. Do you expect him/her to be superhuman? Some mistakes are big, and some are small. But it is so important to learn to have that natural bias that we have for ourselves and make it second nature to feel the same for our partner.

Having a successful marriage may not be easy, but it is well worth it. Just remember to be a little bit bias.

Israel Memorial Day
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